The single best way to develop leaders is to take people out of their safe environment and away from the people they know, and throw them into a new environment they they nothing about. And make sure they are way over their head, preferably where they have to figure things out on their own without the assistance of a mother hen hoovering over them. In fact, the more demanding their challenges, the more pressure and risk they face, the more likely a dynamic leader will emerge.
Philippians 2:3 – Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves.
In the deep south on the river from Memphis to New Orleans two cargo paddle ships left at the same time carrying cargo. As they traveled beside one an other, the crew began boasting about the speed of the ship each were traveling on. The boasting quickly turned into trash talk and the two boats were soon racing to see who could arrive at their destination first.
Each boat began adding more and more coal to the burner to increase speed. After a while one boat began to lag behind. It realized that it would run out of coal before it reached it’s destination.
The other ship on the other hand refused to let up. It would make the voyage in record time if it could just keep up the pace.
Soon however, the crew did run out of coal. Then they realized that the wooden cargo would burn just as well as the coal. So they began burning their cargo ( the entire purpose for making the trip ) They continued to throw cargo into the fiery pit until they arrived in New Orleans in record time.
As a leader are you burning your cargo to accomplish a goal? Are you sacrificing the your people? Are you burning the healthy and positive environment that produces long term results in order to reach a long term goal?
Are you as a family member walking over a loved one for something that is not really that important in the long run?
I suggest you get your priorities straight if that is the case.
Ancient scripture says to be content with what you have and be content in all things. But this causes a internal struggle personally for anyone who has ambition to have more or even become more than they already are. So is it justified to feel guilty about being ambitious? If you want more are you discontent?
Well I think defining the two will help clear the air.
- unhappy because you crave more
- thinks happiness is dependent of achievement
- a sense of grievance
- an unquenched longing
- a strong desire to accomplish something
- typically requiring determination or hard work
- a drive for success
If you have ambition it doesn’t nessecarrly mean you are discontent. Rather discontentment normally stems from external forces not satisfying the internal needs of a person. A person who is discontent is relying heavily on external needs being met in order to be happy.
Ambition is being happy with what you have in pursue of what you want. Ambition is when your internal needs are satisfied while you try to achieve external goals. So can someone be ambitious without being considered discontent? Of course they can! And they can do it without guilt.
I realize that most of what I write about pertains to leadership, character, and management techniques, but I think this topic is very important because it ties directly into your work life and the relationships you create there. I’ll try to crudely paint a quick scenario that will tie in my point.
A man has an someone at his place of employment that he normally gets along with. That person is normally pretty reasonable but today he seems to step out of the norm and is a total jerk.
The man gets home and tells his wife about it. Of course being a good spouse she immediately listens then comes to the quick conclusion her husband is right and that guy at work is a jerk indeed. She can tell this has really bothered her man so understandably she is upset also.
The next day at work the man who acted like a jerk comes to the man and explains how he is sorry for the way he acted. The husband accepts his apology and the happy work life continues.
The weekend comes around and the husband and wife see the man who acted like a jerk in town. The husband speaks, shares a few pleasantries and pretty much act like they are best friends.
Meanwhile the wife is in the background, keeping to herself with quite animosity toward the man who hurt her husband. She holds on to this animosity close to her chest until his name is brought up in conversation and a little at a time it is released exposing the hurt she has shared for her husband.
The point here is the husband got to work out his feelings toward the man who has wronged him. The wife was never given that opportunity. A spouse was designed to be your partner. You have to respect them and how they function (wanting to defend you).
I’m not saying you can’t vent to your loved one. You can. What I am saying is you shouldn’t only use them as a sounding board to work out your own problems without walking them to a healthy resolution also.
When you use your spouse as a sounding board, then work out your problems away from them and leave them holding all the animosity, that is SELFISH. Either walk them through the whole process with you by keeping them informed or don’t vent to them at all.
Two preachers were making the journey back from a long but local mission. The two approached the large river they must cross in order to get back to their village. As the arrived at the river bank and gathered their make-shift barge made from scrap lumber and twine, the first preacher couldn’t help but notice a very attractive and very unclothed woman bathing in the river.
He tried not to notice but couldn’t stop his eyes from cutting over to catch a glance. Each time he would get a more angry. Who does that woman think she is? Does she not know we are men of God. Is she trying to go to hell?
Suddenly the woman jumped out of the water, grabbed her clothes and ran over to the preachers. “Can I get a ride across the river? I really don’t feel like making the swim?”
Before the first preacher could turn this hell bound flusie down the second preacher chimed in, “Sure thing. We’d be be happy to. The old barge isn’t much, but she hasn’t sank yet.” He helped her on the small raft to the disapproval of the first preacher and off they went.
They reached the other side and the second preacher helped her down and she thanked them and said goodbye. The second preacher said goodbye but the first preacher only offed a scorned look, mostly at his own wore out shoes.
The two preachers walked a good little way in silence, maybe two or three miles. Finally the first preacher opened up, “You know. I’ve known you for years. I can’t believe you picked up that Jezebel of a woman. She was NAKED for heaven’s sake. What kind of woman does that? I bet she was trying to seduce us. What kind of preacher are you anyway? Is this how you act away from the church? What if someone would have seen us with her?”
The second preacher just gave a little nonchalant smirk and continued walking a few steps then put his hand on the first preacher’s shoulder and said, “You may be right, but I dropped the woman off at the river bank. You’ve been carrying her around for the last three miles.”
Accusatory tone – indicating or suggesting that one believes a person has done something wrong
- Mrs. Jones called and you still haven’t called her
- This is the second time this has been turned in to you
- We are doing our part
- Can you make a little time in your busy schedule to take care of this?
- He won’t answer the phone
- That department always screws it up for everyone
- I looked and you still haven’t done it.
This nasty undertone causes so much strife and tension in the work place. Work is hard enough without someone insinuating you aren’t doing your part. These accusations cause you to go on the defense defending yourself on everything until you get fed up and go on the offensive which causes a turf war.
Be better than that. Lose the accusatory tone. Don’t jump to the conclusion that someone has done something wrong. Your subconscious will leak that undertone into your words. Simply follow the evidence on it’s face value and ask questions. You may even keep your big fat foot from going in your big fat mouth.